26 October 2002

It’s the weekend in the Real World

…and so I have a little tidying up to do, and some toddling around the Motor City until getting back to work in a few days. Besides all that, there are huge protests planned all over the country. Which means that the govt database information systems engineers will be working overtime this weekend crunching all the data so that the BFEE can analyze it before the (s)elections.

Conveniently, the sniper (hopefully) has been caught just as Drinky McDumbass finishes a whirlwind tour of Repugnicant largesse, er, Repugnicant fund-raising activity, er, government-sponsored Repugnicant propaganda indoctrination. Yeah. That’s the ticket… By the way, I refuse to succumb to the mind-blowing real-life irony of the guy using a Bushmaster. I instead cringe at the reality: that the company making the frelling gun has been a card-carrying member of the BFEE for years – supplying them with their borderline illegal arsenal pieces. But that’s another story… TM

also in the news: one of the leading voices of reason in our current sorry excuse for a federal government just died in a plane crash in Minnesota. Which means that the fate of our Senate until the (s)election is in the hands of: Jesse Ventura! Yet again more real-life irony…

also in the news: actor Richard Harris died at age 72 today. Ditto monkeys everywhere rejoice that another commie fag pinko junkie stops tapping into their hard earned Social Security Fund.

also in the news: a couple of the Media Whores can’t stand dispensing the misinformation currently being spewed by the White House, and they write one article (each) telling a little bit about what is really going on in the Oval Orifice these days. The rest of the Media Whores stand by and watch as the (p)Resident’s Doberman Fleischer tries to tear one of their throats out.

finally, in local news: Aretha Franklin’s $10Mil mansion in the posh suburbs burns down to the ground. She had already moved all her stuff back into her current residence within the Detroit city limits, however, so it appears the only ‘person’ injured will be the insurance company in its’ fictional corporate persona. As soon as Aretha can get the scratch together to pay for the lawyers to refute the arson allegations that they are already bringing in order to avoid paying on the claim.

Go and read these articles, and look at every site over there in my links zone.. Koresh, I gotta go talk to some friends about all this and maybe get away from reality for a while. Try and have a good weekend in spite of all this, okay?

25 October 2002

Paul Wellstone (D-Sensible), RIP

Koresh on a crutch! I just read at blah3.com (thanks Don!) that CNN is reporting the death of Senator Wellstone, along with everyone else on board.

I cannot think of anything to say right now but a long and emphatic string of obscenities. This was one of the voices in the wilderness, kiddies...

Please join me in mourning the loss of one of the few good politicians in DC over the last few years. And, if you live in Minnesota, please Please PLEASE let's have another Repugnicant lose to a dead guy, okay? I don't think they have anyplace left in the junta to kick him upstairs to, so we might find out how a Repugnicant feels about being in the unemployment line... if the Media Whores pay any attention once he's no longer of any use to the powers that be.

23 October 2002

Fun With Words

Okay – today we have a double feature! The Repugnicant Punks of Amerika have two nicknames here at the Funny Farm: the one they originally stood for (GOP) and their more accurate acronym these days, GHP (for Grand Hypocrisy Party). So, without further ado…

for Either G might I suggest: Ghoulish, Gross, Ghastly, Grody (ohmyGawd!), Grinchlike, Ghastly, Grungy, Gluttonous, Gangrenous, Gorging
for O might I suggest: Oafish, Obstructive, Obsolete, Orcish, Outtatouch
for H might I suggest: Hypocritical, Heretical, Hirsute, Horrendous, Hardheaded
for Either P might I suggest: Prattlers, Pagans, Peons, Prudes, Philanderers, Phlegmatics, Protozoa, Prigs, Psycopaths

Remember who Stole the 2000 Election!
Vote anything but Repugnicant!

22 October 2002

Where do we go from here?

Now that the first flush of online journalling has come and gone, I sit and wonder: what do I say now? So many others have said so many things about the Chimpster that I wonder if I can add anything else relevant. You can find all of the stuff I post to without my guidance. That is utilizing the assumption that there are others who actually view this…

Besides, who am I to complain? If I can put this onto the Net, that means I’m already one of the privileged few . And I make enough scratch to be able to find the spare time to put this together. So what’s the deal, you might well ask? Especially because your Humble Narrator doesn’t seem to have a clue either…

OK - so here’s the deal: I am going to justify this to myself if I can manage to get somebody else to find some sort of benefit from reading the Funny Farm. Even if it’s just relief from the tedium, strife, stress, etc. of whatever it is that you are trying to get through in your journey through life. If I can manage to make someone smile I’ll consider that a huge win. If you actually laugh at anything you see here, you win! Please send an SASE (self-addressed social email) to thekid@enterprisingkiddstuff.net and let me know what you laughed at and why.* Any other positive feedback (constructive criticism can be positive) is gratefully and thoughtfully examined by our exemplary staff and treated appropriately. And, even if no one heeds this call I might just think of continuing the blog anyhow!

* Contest not open to LDotards, FreeperTrash or Ditto Monkeys. You must be able to articulate your points without resorting to puerile language. No animals will be harmed by entering this contest.

I just saw this link to Molly Ivin’s latest column on BartCop. This is a must read. Koresh, I was going to go to sleep early tonight and I’m knee deep in BFEE swill! Aaaaaaaaargh!

On another note, I have an advance copy of what I consider to be one of the best BartFest 2002 reports yet. Hold on to your hats, kiddies, and come with me on a wondrous and happy journey to the Promised Land:

I met Tom in July. He is a really cool, eccentric guy. As I got to know him, I realized that politics played a large role in his life. At first I was a little leery, as he seemed very fanatical about it. He has a routine in the morning before work-coffee, bartcop, coffee, buzzflash, coffee, ann-slanders, coffee, michael moore.....you get the picture. But as I listened to him and starting reading, it dawned on me that our country, our world, is in trouble, serious trouble, largely because of this one little man and his agendas. I was one of the people who stuck their heads in the sand and hoped for the best. Some of the stuff I was reading literally made me sick! I tell you this because this was my introduction to Bartcop.

Tom had already planned on attending Bartfest, so he asked me if I'd like to come along. I thought, "What the hell". I've always wanted to go to Vegas but I was hesitant about attending the party. What would I talk about, would I look stupid and uneducated if I can't participate in the conversations, do they have a secret handshake I don't know about and I'll instantly be labeled as an outsider? Nothing could have been farther from the truth. As soon as we walked into the suite, I felt at ease. Everyone was smiling and seemed genuinely interested in knowing who we were. I have never encountered such a friendly, intelligent group of people before. I admit, I didn't participate in many of the political conversations, but I listened and absorbed. It is SO refreshing to encounter people who have opinions, who share a passion for their cause. Too many people complain about the government but don't even VOTE, much less attend rallys, gatherings, or contact their local officials.

I had a blast at the party. I was one of the "smokers", so I spent a large part of my evening in the hall, then in the ladies bathroom. I met Holly & Al from Minnesota. Al whipped out the "Bonnet De Douche" (showercap) from the supply in the bathroom after talk turned to some of us partaking in the wonderful jacuzzi tub with a great view. Another hour and a few more shots and the suds would have been rollin' into the other room. Julio and his friend and provided lots of interesting conversation and laughs. (Sorry, I can't remember everyones name either). I met Steve the camera guy and his lovely "wife". Bana and Nick, Will, Mrs. Bartcop, Baconslab, Tommy, Tom, Brew, John from Ann-Slanders......these are a few that stick out in my mind. I met so many great people I wish I could remember all the wonderful moments I had. After the festivities, we headed to the roulette wheel where I was lucky enough to be the BIG Weiner, oh,um Winner! Which was a thrill and there again, everyone was so genuinely happy, it was like their number had come up too. We were all winners, just by virtue of us being able to meet each other and spend some time together.

Tom & I then headed to someone's suite for a little after-party. Baconslab, The Brew, ann-slanders, Will and _______** were there also. Boy, what a conversation! Will & I had to step out of the "ring" a few times. I don't know about him, but my brain was just way overstimulated!! But it was a joy to see these guys in action and Tom was in his glory to be participating in such a discussion. After a while, the boys went to Gold Coast to gamble and I hit the hay. I was mentally & physically exhausted and it felt damn good.

As far as Vegas goes, we drove out & I'll never forget cresting the hill before town and seeing the glow of all the lights, then driving down the strip, just takin' it all in. I've seen Vegas on TV plenty of times, but seeing it in person was the BOMB! We went to see Penn & Teller, took a white knuckle ride in an airplane over the Grand Canyon (can you say turbulance?), went to Fremont St and did fairly well on the blackjack tables.

I am so glad I attended Bartfest. It inspired me to become more knowledgeable about our government and made me realize that we can make a difference. I am a Registered Nurse and I see the affects these policies have on my patients, especially the elderly, every day. When a person has to decide weather to eat or take their medication, that is just plain WRONG. They end up hospitalized when they could have just taken their pills properly, how is that saving money? Of course, I could go on and on and on and on.........

I am really looking forward to the next Bartfest.

Thank you, Bart, for what you do.

** I believe the room was in AlanfromHouston’s name, who is the mystery name in her report. Alan, if you can read this, did you find a portfolio with some calendars in it in your room when you checked out? If so, get back to me. And thanks for hosting the party after the party!