20 March 2004


Live Consumables Alert: the Funny Farm suggests you finish consuming any victuals before proceeding any further.

Go to the Onion and check out their latest offering. Here’s just a small taste for you to tingle your imagination:

Bush Calls Incumbency Key Issue Of Campaign

WASHINGTON, DC—At a campaign dinner Monday, President Bush identified incumbency as the key issue in the upcoming presidential election. "Look at my opponent's record on incumbency," Bush said. "John Kerry is not the president at this time. That's an indisputable matter of public record." Bush added that the American public should seriously consider whether it wants to risk electing a president who has no experience heading a nation, has never resided in the White House, and does not have even one State Of The Union address under his belt.

How Long Were We Sober on St. Patty’s Day

18 March 2004

Minor Internet Weirdness

So, I'm checking out my stats at Site Meter (the tracking tool of choice for cheapo bastards like me), and I notice something a little funny:
Funny Farm visitor stats
Hmmmmmm. Just yesterday I saw a whole bunch of traffic for that suspicious looking valley on the graph. Did Site Meter lose everybody's data for the last several days, or am I just special?

I also did some more digging in Site Meter, and based upon those results, I would like to welcome all of my visitors from the General Services Administration, Sandia National Labratories (how do you get that dot gov e-dress?), the edumacated students at the universities of Washington, Umass Boston, Florida State and Harvard, as well as the people at Woolworths Group PLC. Hope you enjoy what you see around here. Please come back from time to time.

I would also like to thank all of you who keep on coming back for more. I have a nice long post almost ready for Open Source Politics about the changes going on around here. In the meantime, March Madness has come upon America once again. It’s pretty contagious – I might be coming down with a case of it myself. (cough)

17 March 2004

Thought Experiment

Thanks to my fellow blogger(s) over at the Modulator, who has pointed to this story (free subscription required) at the Washington Post. I am a little curious about what others might think of this scenario:

Part One: France captures Osama you Mama;
Part Two: France turns Bin Laden over to the International Criminal Court;
Part Three: the Chimperor demands that the international court hand Osama over to the United States;
Part Four: the International Criminal Court says that, because the United States has not signed on to be a part of the ICC, No Osama for you!

Any guesses as to what Part Five of the scenario would be?

15 March 2004

A Call To Action From Ezra Klein (Still Not A Genius) of Pandagon

These young whippersnappers seem to be finding all of the news first. Then again, if it wasn’t for him and the rest of my fellow bloggers, I wouldn’t even be reading this much of the whore media. Thank goodness we have somebody who manages to hold his nose long enough to pluck out gems (cough) like this one from Time Magazine. Besides being immensely slanted conservative in its writing, and totally focused on the threat to the Chimperor that this upstart Taxachusetts liberal holds, it shows us the unbridled arrogance of the unelected miserable failure [emphasis and incredulity courtesy of the Funny Farm]:

Many Bush allies are trying to push up the return of the President's longtime aide Karen Hughes from her semi-retirement in Austin, Texas, to restore the balance in Bush's world between Rove's political instincts, which lean toward tending the party's base, and her more "Mom-in-the-kitchen sense of the country," as an adviser described it. "There is a necessary push-pull between the two of them that can't happen on the phone," says a Bush official. Another puts it more darkly: "The longer they wait for her to get back, the less it will matter." On the other hand, Hughes has already been intimately involved in many of Bush's most controversial moves. She helped craft the poorly received State of the Union address, then closely advised on the much criticized campaign ads that used images of 9/11. As the Bush team sorts out its internal mechanics, it will press the advantage of incumbency. Administration sources tell TIME that employees at the Department of Homeland Security have been asked to keep their eyes open for opportunities to pose the President in settings that might highlight the Administration's efforts to make the nation safer. The goal, they are being told, is to provide Bush with one homeland-security photo-op a month.

Oops! Did we just say we were going to use the resources of the Homeland Security Department for partisan political purposes? You mean everybody, especially even pResident Superior Morality, abuses the privilege of their office as a servant of the public? Why was it that anybody is supposed to vote for the clowns currently running this country into the ground again?

And, finally, why does it not surprise me to see Stepford Media Whore Karen Tumulty as one of the co-authors of this piece of dren?