16 January 2004

Heard in the Wilds Of Soviet Canuckistan



Here's a dilemma for you....

With all your honor and dignity what would you do?

This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. Please don't answer it without giving it some serious thought. By giving an honest answer you will be able to test where you stand morally.

The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation, where you will have to make a decision one way or the other. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous. Please scroll down slowly and consider each line - this is important for the test to work accurately.


You're in Florida...In Miami, to be exact... There is great chaos going on around you, caused by a hurricane and severe floods. There are huge masses of water all over you.

You are a CNN photographer and you are in the middle of this great disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless.

You're trying to shoot very impressive photos. There are houses and people floating around you, disappearing into the water. Nature is showing all her destroying power and is ripping everything away.

Suddenly you see a man in the water, he is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken away by the masses of water and mud.

You move closer.
Somehow the man looks familiar.


Suddenly you know who it is - it's George W. Bush!


At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take him away, forever. You have two options. You can save him or you can take the best photo of your life. So you can save the life of George W. Bush, or you can shoot a Pulitzer prize winning photo, a unique photo displaying the death of one of the world's most powerful men.


And here's the question (please give an honest answer):




























Would you select color film, or rather go with the simplicity of classic black and white?




Mad props to my friend Jimmy from the tomato capital of Canada for passing this along. And thanks to the rest of the world for not holding ordinary (non Bible -thumping, queer-hating, corpo-weasel/redneck) Americans completely responsible for the monsters running the United States into the ground.

15 January 2004

A Blizzard Causes Weirdness At The Funny Farm

Well, the metro Detroit area just got around a foot of snow yesterday. It also led to a most excellent adventure at the Funny Farm's new digs.

The oldest of my brothers, who works in the U.S., while maintaining his residence in Canada, gave me a call last night, and spent the night over here in Pontiac instead of braving a long commute and a border crossing. It's my first visit from a member of the family, and I must say it seemed to go rather well.

However, once my brother got to sample some of the delights available to all and sundry here at the Funny Farm, he began behaving unusually. How else can you explain someone deciding, at 9:30 PM on a school night, that I needed to immediately go out into the world and pick up a snow blower in order to clean my driveway of snow. Considering that I had just spent fifteen minutes trying to get the car from the street and up the driveway into the garage, I was forced to admit that he had a point. And, yes, I am getting to be such an old (and lazy) fart that I agreed to go on this glorious adventure.

So, we actually manage to find one for sale and bring it home. It came already set up; all we had to do was pull it out of the box, unfold a couple of pieces, and put a gas/oil mixture into the tank. However, I think the manufacturers should have put another muffler on this gadget. It sounded even louder when echoing in the garage, but it was still way too loud to let my brother use it just after midnight when we got it ready for action. Thank goodness only a ten minute argument was needed to convince him that he shouldn't be running something quite that loud in the middle of the night. There are a lot of law enforcement officers in my subdivision, and I don't think it would be too wise to draw attention to the new neighbor by stuffing him into the back of a squad car.

All in all, everything worked out well. There were a couple less beers than I expected there to be (brother, when did you manage to tuck them away?) in the inventory, and I am going to be suffering from sleep deprivation by the time I get home, but at least my coin collections remain sorted, and there's no new mess to speak of. And I have a new toy to play with tonight when I get home, and enough beer in the fridge to take care of thirsty helpers when I move in most of the big stuff this weekend.

Once again, no Top Five List this week. We would like to point out that a new and indescribably powerful group blog called the American Street has started up recently. Mega-superstars of the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan, including but not limited to Hullabaloo, skippy, Orcinus, Talk Left, The Angry Bear, and The Left Coaster have all banded together at the urging of Cowboy Kahlil. We look forward to reading this blog over the next few months. And you should, too!

13 January 2004

Another Announcement

Due to the small size of my residence these past seven years, I decided to purchase a new home for Ally and I to live together in. So, since December 15th of last year, I have been in the process of packing my stuff up and installing it in my new home as well as bringing some of Ally's stuff, and getting ready to move the rest of it in here.

I am unable to get cable modem service with the company I have been using, so I am trying DSL (and using a satellite TV service) instead of going back to Comcast, which is the only game in my new town if you want cable service.

Plus, we have decided to enjoy ourselves for a while. So the new living room set, and the king size comfy bed, and the suround sound stereo, and the big-screen TV, are mostly in place at the new digs. There are some other setup issues, and a big learning curve (I know how to turn on the equipment, but I am sure there are some cool things that I would be able to do if I could find the time to RTFM*). But, in between the moving, the sinus infection, the changing of services, and the settling in, somehow I haven't been able to find the time...

I have also been remiss in checking out my fellow bloggers over the last month, and strangely silent here at the Funny Farm, since embarking on this wondrous journey. So, I can't do justice to a Top Five List right now. Maybe in another month or so...

So, now you have another piece of the puzzle. I have high hopes that this change will make life a lot easier for me and my baby, and that we will be able to make a go of it in our new home together. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go into work early, and build up a couple of extra hours to make up for the doctor's appointment I will arrange for later in the week.

And, if you know of anyone who wants a fixer-upper in Hazeltucky Hazel Park, Michigan, send me an email. I think I have just the house for them...

*RTFM - old geek acronym for Read The Frelling Manual

11 January 2004

Public Service Announcement

It is with great pleasure that I tell you all what has been keeping me so busy for the last little while: I am in the process of moving my girlfriend (known affectionately in some circles as Ally the Roulette Queen) into my domicile.

We have been considering this for some time, but it is only as recently as recently that we have both had the means and the opportunity to do so. Which is another story that I will talk to you all about sometime soon. But not today.

Today is going to be totally taken up by trucking a few things from her current residence to our new one, and of course watching the football games. I hope they manage to be almost as entertaining as the matches we were privileged to see yesterday. Even though both of the teams I was rooting for were eliminated, the games were so exciting that I don't mind a bit.

And I've got to go now and get things organized a bit more - we're planning on moving all of the big stuff next weekend, and there's a lot of packing to get through before then. Many more updates to come as time and events permit me to post stuff here.