03 October 2003

News Storm Approaching on All Fronts

Atrios has an excellent set of posts about the vile PigBoy, including the best defense of El Chupa Cabra on either side of the blogsphere. While referring to OSP’s Pandagon, to boot!

Go explore. Random guerilla bloggingTM will probably take place from various locations in the North American midwest this weekend. After me and my baby go out for a Saturday night event for the first time in a while. And a momentous occasion (for the Funny Farm) takes place.

More later. For now, it’s time to go to the orifice and knock out some design specs and other bureaucratic nonsense required these days in order to actually do some work. Remember, today is when the BFEE tries to slip news items they don’t want you to pay attention to into the zeitgeist, because (i) you won’t care, you’re busy this weekend; and (ii) you won’t be interested quite so much by the time Monday morning rolls around in the real world. Keep your thinking toques on!

02 October 2003

The Funny Farm Fry(with a Why?)day Top Five Posts of the Week

Thursday October 2, 2003 Gregorian
Fryday 7 Wintring, 2003 Hobbit

[. . . Bill runs through the back lawn of a fabulous estate, through a flowerbed being tended by a gardener, past a swimming pool and through a gate into the mansion. Bill dashes through a hallway past a dining room full of people, who look up, startled, as he goes by. Cut to a desk set up off in the corner of a posh drawing room. You see Bill run into the room and up to the desk, sit down, pick up a piece of paper on the desk, and announce to the camera (talking very fast)...]

This is the Ghost of Bill Sprint with the Funny Farm Fry(with a Why?)day Top Five Posts of the Week:

Number Five - No More Mister Nice Blog's Lawn Ornaments for God;

Number Four - Late Night Thoughts' Trying to Explain One More Time;

Number Three - Ethel the Blog's More Tax Cuts fir the Unemployed;

Number Two - MaxSpeak's Bush's Tax Increase;

And the Number One Post this Week - Very Very Happy's entire week of blog entries!

This has been the Ghost of Bill Sprint with the Funny Farm Fry(with a Why?)day Top Five Posts of the Week.

[... Bill gets up from desk, then runs into the dining room, picks up a glass and drains the contents, then runs out of the house. Cut to exterior camera, where Bill runs off the estate as the hounds are released...]

I think I'm Plamed out for this week. So I thought I would get away from that a bit in my weekly entries. And I had to name another blog entry - No More Mister Nice Blog names the first entries for each day, but not any of the others. D'oh! Sorry, but Bill's Ghost demands that I provide him with a script, and you know how demanding the talent gets once it gets a taste of power. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!

I also should have known better than to include Josh Marshall in last week's Top Five. But I'm rethinking that whole not letting professional writers win thing. Maybe they should have their own list or something.

I'm not rethinking the OSP rule, however. We should have a separate list , too! I have to say that this week we really shone, and would have definitely been in the top five if I allowed them to enter this contest. And of course one of my personal faves, Uggabugga, absolutely rocked the whole week. He gets the honorable mention once again.

Then again, with the Plamethrower belching, the BFEE (as well as da Bears on Monday Night Football) bumbling, Limbaugh race-baiting, and more conservative verbal diarrhea than the Texas Legislature (is Tom Delay still redrawing the frelling map, by the way? And for how much of his constituents tax dollars per day? We wonders, aye, we wonders...), it was like shooting fish in a barrel for the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan this week. It was mondo tough getting it down to five this week - and I hope it keeps on being this tough every week.

Editors Note: A couple of words were added, and as always spelling and typos are fixed as quickly as possible.

A Public Service Announcement

OPEN SOURCE POLITICS has exploded in readership this week. These entries have become must reads for the informed:

Robert Novak is a coward, The CIA's Patriotic Math, A Matter of Trust, I Have A Little List ... are all about The Valerie Plame Affair.

There's also the Ben Franklin True Patriot Act Action Alert, Pie In the Sky, The Politics of Power; Barry's two-parter, Asbestos Legislation #1; and #2, and the Florida Political Breakdown.

It's all good.

Well, At Least I Can Watch Sunday Countdown Again

Rush Limbaugh has resigned from ESPN. I wonder (well, not really) if he'll use this as a vehicle to rant about the unfairness of the liberal media.

He's getting pummeled today about popping lots of pills when he lost his hearing, too. I can sympathize - I mean, being able to hear nothing at all except that incessant PigBoy stream of lies, hypocrisy and innuendo running around inside your melon would be enough to drive anyone over the edge, don't you think?

Thanks to Arthur Silber of The Light of Reason by way of Ted Barlow over at Crooked Timber for the news!

01 October 2003

A Brief Message From RB Ham, and Some Other Things

For those of you who remember reading Print Think a while back, there has been some activity and some disclosure going on that I think you should know about. I'll leave it at that, out of respect for the personal nature of the situation. Nose about on your own.

In the day late and dollar short category, I just finished watching Jon Stewart (I - Funniest Man on TV) and Joe Scarborough (R - Murdering Lying Media Nazi Whore) go at it on the Daily Show last night. Joe looked pretty angry out there, and Jon looked like the more professional fake journalist in the segment. Especially because all he had to do was sit back and turn the crank every so often, metaphorically speaking, and the hate speech just kept oozing from the pores of Joe for as long as he kept on pontificating. I wonder if there was any discussion about topics being off limits before the show. And I also wonder how long it will be before the Daily Show takes a whack at the vile Pigboy for his comments about Donovan McNabb the other day.

I'd like to take a moment to thank my sweetie for her help with my latest short story over at Open Source Politics. She was kind enough to offer me some suggestions regarding what I should write about when I was struggling for inspiration. Thanks, baby!

And, finally, I feel compelled to mention to you all once more that Bill Maher put on one hell of a season ending show. He and his guests all said things that were much worse than what he lost his ABC show over. And hardly anyone has even made mention of it at all. I mean, I know there has been a lot of crap finally hitting the fan in the real world, but here in the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan we have known most of the details for some time now. We're just waiting to see if you're going to let the Chimperor get away with it again. So I'd like to give mad props to Real Time for going out for the year with an excellent show!

New Mini-Onion

Inspired by busybusybusy and d-squared, of course!

48 Hour Internet Outage Plunges Nation Into Productivity

News In Brief

Schwarzenegger Running Out Of Movie-Related Campaign Slogans

LOS ANGELES—Two months after he announced his candidacy for the California gubernatorial recall election, Arnold Schwarzenegger is running out of movie-related campaign quips. "Government and special-interest groups should not be 'Twins,'" the actor said during the Sept. 24 debate. At a fundraising breakfast Monday, the actor told a confused group of business leaders, "I will 'Jingle All The Way' to Sacramento!" Breakfast attendee Ken Straus said Schwarzenegger "really hit the bottom of the barrel" minutes later, when the actor announced, "In the movies, I played Hercules going bananas. But it's the tax-and-spend Democrats who are really going bananas."

Satan Depressed All Weekend After Man Opts Out Of Casino Trip

UNCASVILLE, CT—Satan, The Father Of Lies, suffered a dispiriting blow Saturday, when potential sinner Jeffrey Kremer chose to forgo a soul-polluting trip to the Mohegan Sun Resort Casino, The Prince Of Darkness said Monday. "I had hoped that the allure of the bright lights and the promise of instant wealth would tempt Kremer into the mortal sin of avarice," a despondent Lucifer said. "Alas, he told his friends that he felt like spending the day hanging out around the house, instead of joining them at the casino. Curses!" Satan said he hopes that Kremer will at least watch softcore pornography on cable before the week is over.

Shiny New Toys Being Made With Your Tax Dollars

So, I'm reading CalPundit the other day, and he points me over to a couple of posts by ESPN's Tuesday Morning Quarterback, Gregg Easterbrook, over at his nicely named Easterblogg about new military hardware. Being a guy who likes toys, I was naturally intrigued by the thought of what military minds have concocted over the last little while.

But I was really surprised to see the gratuitous ClenisTM bashing coloring the entire analysis. Seeing as how we were supposed to be talking about new toys, and all. I like the one link he put in to the ship, but why didn't he let us look at the plane too? I wonder what the new prototype F35 mentioned looks like, but I think I'll be seeing enough DoD traffic as it is without linking to those specs too.

And, I'm thinking that an awful lot of modern feudal lords captains (cough) of industry future ex-CEOs are going to be wanting one of those Littoral Combat Ships. At corporate discount prices! After all, it'll be the marks shareholders taxpayers customers who end up paying in the end, right? (wink)

29 September 2003

Traitorgate Hits the Fan

Could this story finally be to big for the media whores to ignore? Eschaton certainly seems to think so. Hesiod over at Counterspin Central has pointed out the smarmy insolence of the conservative area of the Blogosphere in general, and the turtle-like behavior of InstaCracker in particular, over the issue. For a few brave souls on that side of the fence, it's cut and dried. If there is proof of the alleged charges, then they say let's try the bastards and take care of the problem. I hope they maintain that attitude in the face of possible hostility from their fellow conservative bloggers, some of whom might be less than sympathetic (cough) with anyone questioning the 200 Million Dollar Dunsel's actions. He's on a mission from God, don'cha know.

There are some others who you should read to find out why people are so upset about this. Josh Marshall, Kevin Drum, Mark Kleiman, and Open Source Politics are all over this story. I haven't had time to check thoroughly, but I'm pretty sure Blah3 (he's calling it The 5,000 Pound Anchor) and TBTM are pumping it even more than they have since it broke two months ago on the Fashionable Left Bank of BlogistanTM. And of course you can probably count on some coverage from hour to hour time to time from the likes of Media Whores Online, Buzzflash, Cursor, and Alternet.

What it basically comes down to (as far as I can figure) is this : someone in the machinery of the God Squad Bush administration exposed an undercover operative of the CIA. This is a crime with some serious punishment attached to it.

There are some other juicy details I could throw in about the whole thing - how this was all a means of revenge and a means of intimidation to those who dare to question the Chimperor; how the junta has already said they have all the records, which means they have known about this, and been stonewalling the investigation for two months; how the Media Whores have known exactly who did what for those same two months and said nothing; or how this is just another huge example of the criminally megalomaniacal behavior coming from the inner sanctum of the Repugnicant Party. But you should go check out the links shown above and familiarize yourself with the situation on your own.

Mini Onion

Such a delicious edition that I've finally gotten to. Here's some personal faves and a pretty picture. Now go and read the whole thing yourselves!

U.S. Government to Discontinue Long-Term Low-Yield Investment in Nations Youth

Canada and India Sheepishly Resolve Border Dispute

From the News In Brief section:
Church, State Joyfully Reunite After 230-Year Trial Separation
WASHINGTON, DC?Following a two-and-a-quarter-century-long trial separation, Church and State reunited in the U.S. Department of Justice press room Monday. "Even through all the bad times, I knew there had to be a way to get these two old friends back together," Attorney General John Ashcroft said. "With a little counseling and faith-based intervention, I knew Church and State would work it out. It was meant to be." Effective Oct. 15, prayer will be mandatory in public schools and congressional sessions will open with Holy Communion.

Why are we so late?

28 September 2003

Referent Resource

I’ve been meaning to do this housekeeping for a while. And I have a couple of other things on the To Do list that will be impacting your consciousness soon. But, for now, here’s a list of the postings of mine over at Open Source Politics:

Off Color Commentary

This (off color commentator) is the position I was meant for in the broadcast booth. Pretty much every obscene, scatalogical, and irreverently humorous thing that you have said to the TV screen during the football game has been said by me to that same screen. Once in a while I get some laughs from the captive audience at hand, too! So, I think that qualifies me for the position. You can all thank the powers that be that it’s not a paying position - otherwise, your kids would be parroting the off color commentators’ catch phrases on Monday at school.

Anyways,... I just wanted to talk about the season ending episode of Real Time with Bill Maher. First, to any residents of Riverside, California who actually voted for Darrell Issa: are you guys clinically insane? After hearing his segment once again last night, I am forced to say that this guy is a certified head case. He made zero sense logically, and reinforced my earlier comments on the subject - he made an idiot of himself, the recall process in general, and the Muscleheaded Black Plowman in particular.

If this is the best and brightest the Repugnicant Party has to offer, I am almost in shock that they have managed to get their hands on so much of the legislative machinery in the United States.

To the rest of the world I say: the lunatics are in control of the asylum over here. At least until 2004. You can help by boycotting all U.S. products until then. And continuing to hold Whistle Ass’s feet to the fire about Iraq and Afghanistan. And (a personal daydream here at the Funny Farm) it would be nice to see and hear about the General Assembly standing up en masse and turning their backs on the Chimperor the next time he speechifies in front of them.

On final bit of opinion (based on a startling fact) for you today: the CEO of Diebold, a Bush poineer, held a fundraiser for the Repugnicant Party in Columbus, Ohio, where he committed to helping Ohio deliver its electoral votes to the president next year. In a case of karmic justice, Columbus was subject to severe thunderstorms for the night.

How many pulpits denounced this hijacking of democracy on Sunday? As opposed to how they railed against our last legally elected president for getting a blowjob outside of the sanctity (cough) of the holy (cough) bonds of matrimony? Inquiring minds want to know...